Until the past few days, our 4-year-old son, Andrew, has mainly prayed something like the following before dinner: “Dear Jesus, help us to have a good day tomorrow, and help this food to be good.” However, in the past few days, he has started to pray more spontaneously and creatively before dinner. Here are some highlights: “Give us this day our holy bread” “Help us worship you even when we are in heaven” ...
Today should have been my cousin Eric’s 32nd birthday. Instead, having lost him earlier this year to some serious health complications after a devastating motorcycle accident, we gathered to remember him and celebrate his life. Another member of our family gone too soon. Two passages of Scripture came to mind as I thought about Eric today. First, this one from Ecclesiastes (which I previously wrote a bit about after the untimely death of my Uncle Tim). ...
Lest my previous parenting post suggest that things are all doom-and-gloom at the Steele-haus, here are 10 things I love about my kids. I got to baptize all 3 of them as babies, a poignant reminder that they are beloved children of God. They all love books, which warms my nerdy heart. The way Eleanor (1yo) greets me. It used to be a very excited squeal. Now it’s “Ah! Daddy!” Andrew (4yo) has a great memory for stories, especially Bible stories. I was redoing our fire pit, and spraying it with a hose to cut down on dust as I re-leveled the ground. Andrew: “Elijah put water on the fire, too!” (see 1 Kings 18). Eva (6yo) is smart as a whip. She asks great questions, and I’m looking forward to (re-)learning with her as she gets older. Eleanor’s recently learned how to do an overly-exaggerated “angry eyebrows” face, and I find it absolutely hilarious. She now does it to get a laugh. Andrew loves Spiderman, and he goes back-and-forth on whether or not he thinks superheroes are real. Listening to him as he narrates Spiderman scenarios while running around in his Spiderman costume is always entertaining. Eva will sometimes read books to Andrew and Eleanor. They will then imitate her–Andrew, by reciting stories from memory as he turns through the books, and Eleanor, by babbling to herself as she flips the pages. I can get them all to watch things with me like This Old House, DIY videos, tool reviews, etc. Partially because they’re all curious and enjoy learning about tools. Partially (OK, mostly) because they’re thankful they’re watching *something* on the TV. They’re all still young enough that they frequently want hugs and snuggles.
I love my kids, but I sometimes regret having them. Pardon the clickbait-y title and opening sentence. But are we parents allowed to say that? Are we allowed to feel both of those things at once? We’ve got a 6-year-old, a 4-year-old, and an almost-2-year-old. And, no, I don’t actually begrudge them their existence! I want what’s best for their lives and futures. And don’t get me wrong; there are moments of laughter, poignancy, joy, etc. ...
In the quest for personal and professional growth, understanding our unique strengths and personality traits can be incredibly enlightening. Today, I want to share my insights from various personality paradigms and how they shape my approach to work and life. CliftonStrengths: Harnessing Core Talents The CliftonStrengths assessment has been instrumental in identifying my core talents. Here are my top five strengths: Input: I have an insatiable curiosity and a constant desire to collect information. This strength fuels my drive to learn and gather knowledge from diverse sources. Intellection: My love for deep thinking and intellectual discussions is a hallmark of this strength. It allows me to explore complex ideas and engage in thoughtful analysis. Learner: The process of learning excites me. Whether it’s acquiring new skills or understanding new concepts, I thrive in environments that offer continuous growth. Ideation: Creativity and innovation are my playgrounds. I enjoy brainstorming and generating new ideas, which often leads to novel solutions and approaches. Analytical: I have a keen ability to dissect problems and examine them from different angles. This strength helps me make informed decisions based on solid data and evidence. For more on CliftonStrengths, check out Gallup’s CliftonStrengths. ...
I’ve been on a lifelong journey to find hats that will fit my big ol’ head. Now that I’m bald, and the summer months are approaching, I figured it would be good to find one or two more hats to add to my rotation. I’ve narrowed this round down to trying the following hats, in case you’re interested (Amazon affiliate links below): TOO SMALL FOR ME Carhartt Men’s Rugged Professional Series Canvas Mesh-Back Cap (Shadow, One Size) Carhartt Men’s 100289 Odessa Ball Cap (Carhartt Brown, One Size) I’m a sucker for Carhartt and Carhartt brown! This hat is comfortable I like that it looks different than my other hats, which tend to be black, gray, etc. Ankor Ultra Performance Water-Resistant UPF 50 Baseball Hat (Charcoal Gray, One Size) Charcoal gray is my favorite color (not sure what that says about me…) I really like the look and fit of this one Flexfit Men’s Delta Seamless Cap (Dark Grey, XX-Large) Love the look and color of this Very comfortable! I wonder if it’s a tad *too* big for my head, though Flexfit Mens Cool & Dry Sport (Grey, X-Large-XX-Large) This hat gets here in the mail today! I’m excited to try it out ...
I’ve often enjoyed lifting weights, but I’ve never enjoyed going to the gym. So, I’ve long wanted a nice home gym. When we lived in a basement apartment, space was very limited, but I was able to fit a Valor Fitness BD-9 squat rack/stands and an Amazon Basics flat bench in, along with a 300-lb Olympic barbell and weight set from Dicks Sporting Goods. (If you’re similarly pressed for space, I highly recommend those items above!) ...
I know I’m not alone in this, but the past few years have been pretty rough for me. I’ve gained at least 50 pounds. I had a fun part-time gig as a managing editor come to an end. I’ve come to terms with some long-term depression and anxiety. I had a job offer ripped out from under me. I hit pause on and eventually dropped out of my Ph.D. program. I’ve resigned from ordained ministry in the ACNA, my previous denomination. Sure, some things have gone well. I’ve got a loving wife (who’s a superhero) and three healthy children. I’ve got a new career (as a software developer) that I very much enjoy. We’ve got a roof over our heads. I make more money now than I ever have. ...
After a considerable period of discernment, coupled with my growing disaffection with the Anglican Church in North America, I sense God calling me to step away from ordained ministry in the ACNA and instead to focus on my family and my career as a software engineer. This also coincides with plans to move closer to family in NW Ohio (where there is not much of an ACNA presence to speak of) and to then pursue church involvement outside of the ACNA. ...
Here are 32 things I’ve learned from life, so far. You are not your thoughts. There is a “you” behind and above your inner voice/monologue/dialogue. Pay attention to what you pay attention to. Think about what you think about. We always only have the present moment. Focusing too much on the future leads to anxiety. Focusing too much on the past leads to depression. Wherever you are, be fully there, now! (Read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle [affiliate link here and throughout] for more on this.) It’s OK not to be OK. Feeling anxious, depressed, angry, etc. is fine. However, avoid the trap of feeling anxious about how anxious you feel, feeling depressed about how depressed you feel, etc. (Learned this from The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris.) If you never make mistakes, you’re not learning/growing as well as you could be. Perfectionism is a deadly prison. Break free with “good enough” and “always learning.” You are stronger than you think you are. You are weaker than you think you are. Ask more questions. Ask better questions. God is not a thing among things. There is an “infinite qualitative difference” between God and everything that is not God, everything that exists. Jesus of Nazareth is the living Lord of all. ___ is not. Beware of overconfidence in what the Bible (or any other sacred text, for that matter) “clearly”does or does not say. God is devoted to the poor and powerless. Those who speak and act on God’s behalf should speak and act for the poor and powerless. To do better with people, ask them questions about themselves. (Read the classic How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.) You can’t out-exercise your appetite forever. Eat food. Mostly plants. Not too much. Get enough sleep. You probably don’t get enough sleep. Lift heavy things. Go outside. Take a walk. Open a Roth IRA. Invest consistently in low-cost mutual funds or lifecycle funds as soon as you can. (Learned this from I Will Teach You to Be Rich by Ramit Sethi.) Reading is a superpower. You can learn from as many other lives and lifetimes as you want. Learn how to read. Then learn how to learn. Then, learn whatever you want! Always read with a pen or pencil in your hand. If you really want to learn from a book, buy a physical copy and annotate the heck out of it. You always have to earn and keep your audience’s attention. Before/while communicating, ask yourself “Why should they care? What’s in it for them?” Humans are incredibly good at misunderstanding each other. Before/while communicating, ask yourself “How might I be misunderstood? How might I be misunderstanding others?” Remember that you and your loved ones are all going to die. What do you want to be known for? Eulogize people BEFORE they die. Everyone should go to therapy for at least a few months. “Slow is smooth. Smooth is fast.” Feeling nervous/stressed/angry/etc.? SLOW DOWN, especially if you’re in front of other people. Courage is a choice, not a feeling. No matter how nervous you are, you can always ACT courageously. Everyone is trying to figure it out as they go along. Do you often feel like an imposter? Join the club! Act like you’ve been here before. Act like you’ve done this before. Act calm, comfortable, and confident, if for no other reason than to help the people around you feel calm, comfortable, and confident. Leadership is service. Leadership is the willingness to make a decision for the good of the group even when it’s awkward or uncomfortable to do so. Focus on what you can control. Journal. What do you really want? What are you afraid of? What’s the most important thing you need to get done today? Get a notebook and write it down! In many domains, 80% of the outcomes/effects come from 20% of the inputs/causes. Find the “vital few” things that have outsized impacts, both positive and negative, on your life. Double-down on what’s helping you. Get rid of what’s hurting you. Use smoked paprika. You’re welcome.